Friday, March 27, 2009

You know you're a nurse when..


1) the front of your scrubs reads 'Nurses... here to save your butt, not kiss it!'

2) you occasionally park in the space with the 'physicians only' sign... and knock it over.

3) you believe some patients are alive only because it's illegal to kill them.

4) you recognize that you can't cure stupid.

5) you own at least three pens with the names of prescription medications on them.

6) you believe there's a special place in hell for the inventor of the call light .

7) you believe that saying 'it can't get any worse' causes it to get worse just to show you it can.

8) you wash your hands BEFORE you go to the bathroom .

9) you believe that any job where you can drive to work in your pajamas is a cool one.

10) you consider a tongue depressor an eating utensil.

11) eating microwave popcorn out of a clean bedpan (or emesis basin) is perfectly natural.

12) you've been exposed to so many x-rays that you consider it a form of birth control.

13) you've ever heard a patient with a nose ring, a brow ring,twelve earrings and multiple tattoos say 'I'm afraid of shots.'

14) you've ever placed a bet on someones blood alcohol level.

15) you've told a confused patient that your name is that of a coworker and to call if they need help.

16) your bladder can expand to the size of a Winnebago's water tank.

17) you have seen more boobs than any man could dream of.

18) you believe that not all patients are annoying...some are unconscious.

19) your family and friends refuse to watch medical sitcoms with you because you spend the whole time correcting everyone and pointing out upside down x-rays.

20) you don't get excited about blood, unless it's your own.

21) you've sworn to have 'do not resuscitate' tattooed on your chest. Soon.

22) discussing dismemberment over a gourmet meal is perfectly normal to you .

23) your idea of fine dining is anywhere you can sit down to eat.

24) your idea of a good time is a cardiac arrest at shift change.

25) you believe in the aerial spraying of prozac .

26) you believe that 'shallow gene pool' should be a recognized diagnosis.

27) you believe that the government should require permits to reproduce.

28) you believe that unspeakable evils will befall anyone who utters the phrase 'Wow, it's really quiet, isn't it?

29) you have ever wanted to write a book entitled 'Suicide:getting it right the first time.'

30) you have ever had a patient look you straight in the eye and say 'I have no idea how that got stuck in there.'

31) you've had to leave a patients room before you begin to laugh uncontrollably.

As a nurse, I thought this was hysterical! I love being a nurse. And for the record, I have NEVER, EVER, E.V.E.R, thought or done any of these things!! EVER!! Especially not #'s 1,3,4,6,11,17,18,19,22,27 and 31. (Ha, I made you go back up and read them again, didn't I! he he he :) Don't think I'm a terrible person- I am after all, only human!

Anyways, thank you to all of you who are good, nice, compliant patients! I can probably speak for all nurses when I say, "We love you!" And for those of you who are pain-in-the-butt patients, just know that #1 and #3 has probably been thought of in your behalf! j/k Knowing most of you, as friends, I highly doubt any of you are the second type of patients. And I also know that not all nurses are created equal! And some nurses deserve what they get! :) Hopefully, I am not one of those! he he

(Buddy and Deanna, my, your so close to finishing nursing school you can taste it, friends, this post is for you! I am sure you were nodding your head throughout and giggling about it's truthfulness! :) Both of you will be fabulous nurses!)

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Tuesday Treasures

I've been thinking a lot about our country lately. About the direction it is going. I must say I am very frightened. I feel like our Constitution is hanging by a thread-a very thin, worn out thread! This saddens me to no end! Our rights as American people are rapidly diminishing with each passing day. As it is, I find myself with little confidence in our leaders at this time. So, where does this leave me?
I get a lot of comfort in my religion, in knowing that God is on our side. That he will watch over and protect us, if we but do what is simply asked of us and prepare ourselves both in our homes and our hearts. For that knowledge I am deeply grateful!

What also comforts me a great deal, and leads me to my Tuesday Treasure, are the men and woman who are fighting for our freedoms- the freedoms I see quickly plummeting to the ground! It brings me so much comfort that, even though there are many who are not leading this country, or living their lives, the way our founding fathers set up for us, there are those that are brave and strong and are giving their all to defend this country and what it is truly made of! Those men and women who are not only, willingly, risking their lives for our freedom, but who are being the ultimate examples of the kind of men and women we all should be! Men and women who believe in something and won't let the negative pressures of others get in their way! Men and women who are actively doing something about the many rights and freedoms that are being taken away. Men and women who are willing to make the ultimate sacrifice, if necessary, to keep OUR freedoms, OUR country, OUR rights the way our founding fathers and God intended them to be.

OUR AMERICAN SOLDIERS!!!



To all the many soldiers who are fighting, or have fought, in the cold, in the rain, in the wind, in the extreme heat- sacrificing so much of their time, family and ultimately their lives- You are my Treasure-my Faith-my Hope!! No words could ever thank you, and your supportive families, enough! My prayers and love go with you and your family. THANK YOU AND GOD BLESS!
I came across these two poems that wrap up my feelings nicely!

OUR SOLDIERS
When the security of our land is threatened,
We call on our soldier's might,
To go wherever they're needed,
To defend us day and night.

They leave their loves ones behind,
A great price our soldiers must pay.
Let us salute their courage and bravery,
May we remember them each time we pray.

Each time we spot "Old Glory"
Waving for all to see,
Let's think of all the soldiers that have
Kept it flying proud and free.

This great country is tolerant
Of cultures from other lands,
But, when they attack our precious freedom
We will punish with a heavy hand.

Our soldiers are tried and true,
Tempered like carbon steel,
Born of American Spirit;
Raised with American will.

Remember our fallen heroes that died,
So freedom may grow,
To nations around the world,
Wherever our warriors may go.
-Author unknown


THANKS TO THE AMERICAN WARRIORS

From the colonist, who rebelled,
to the soldier of today,
My thanks, be to you,
I know not what else to say.

Since the words I do not have,
to give the tribute that is due,
So a simple heartfelt thanks,
sincerely I give to you.

Thanks to our American heroes,
whose devotion is second to none,
Whose courage and braveness alone
caused many battles to be won.

We have beaten the forces of evil
and carried our flag far and wide,
Because of our American Warriors,
our hearts are filled with pride,

Only because of you and the price
you willingly did pay,
Only because of you,
Old Glory still flies today!
-Author unknown

Saturday, March 14, 2009

Tayla- the Inventor

{Advertisement from channels 1 through 4,
"Toddlin' Tots USA"}
Are you tired of your toddler hurting herself every time she runs into the table? Are you tired of all the bruises they get when they fall into those pesky chairs and end tables? Fear no more!!!
You've heard of the push-up bra! You've heard of the strapless bra! You've even heard of the padded bra! But never have you heard of a bra that not only gives you extra padding and protection but is also ultra absorbent for those darn spills at lunch time!!
Introducing..... a Tayla Lin original-
(...drum roll please...)
The Maxi Bra!!!
Padding where you need it the most!!
(comes in various sizes to accommodate your growing toddler!)

"Look mom, sticker!" You will have the comfort of knowing that your child is well protected and secure- and he/she will think it's a toy! Extra sticky for HOURS and HOURS of padded fun!!

Don't be shy, all the cool kids wear them!!!

Don't let your toddler go another day without the PADDING and PROTECTION she deserves!!

Maxi Bra has a product for each stage of your toddler, period.

ORDER NOW and we will throw in, free of charge, an individual bag for each Maxi Bra- making them completely convenient and easy for on the go protection! Now your child can be safe anywhere, even at grandma's house or the mall!

Don't wait- your toddlers protection is dependant on them!!

CALL NOW!!!! 1-800-MAXIBRA
Have a happy day, Always!!

Wednesday, March 4, 2009

I've got the Jr. High Blues

Do you remember bringing home your first born baby from the hospital? All the thousands of emotions pumping through your nervous yet excited mind! So excited to be a mom, yet so scared of doing something wrong or stupid that would hurt your baby. Just hoping and praying that you will be able to do all that it takes to ensure that your child grows up to be successful and not behind bars!
Well, all those feelings came flooding back to me today. Today I went with Austin to Jr. High registration. JR. HIGH!!!!! (insert loud, scary scream here!) A few of you know that I am scared out of my mind for Jr. High. Not Austin, no he's fine- it's ME- I am a nervous wreck about the new scary world of Jr. High! I don't know why, exactly. I don't remember having a bad experience in Jr. High. It's just the fact that my baby is growing up! He is taking a leap into the "real world" and I'm not sure I'm ready for that! For some reason, I feel like in elementary school he is somewhat protected! That someone is watching over him! Jr. High is soooo big and sooo many kids- and to be honest with you, quite a few of them are down right scary! :O Who's going to be there to watch out for him, to protect him? This is where those feelings I had over 11 years ago come back. I just hope and pray that I have taught him well. That I have taught him how to make good choices, to pick good friends, to realize when he needs help and to know where to go to get it, and most important to know that he is loved- no matter what!


Don't get me wrong, I am also very excited about his new journey! I am very impressed with Oak Canyon and the opportunities they offer. During the presentation, I got chills a few times! I even got teary eyed when I saw Austin come down the halls! ( I know, I know- big shocker!!) I think that these feelings were a gift from Heavenly Father to comfort me and let me know that Austin will do just fine. In fact, I know he'll do great! Austin just radiates love and kindness- there's not much not to love! (can you tell I'm a proud mom) I just hope that maybe Jr. High will help him break out of his shell a little bit!

I know that with every new road we come upon, a path has been provided for us! This journey for Austin, and me, will not be any different! Undoubtably, there will be obstacles! There will be battles to be fought! But we will be given, or have already been given, the weapons and armor to come out victorious. It's going to be scary, but I know that Austin is ready for his new journey! And I know that I will be running aside him to pick him up, if ever he should fall. I love you, Aussy! Your dad and I are so proud of the young warrior you have become! Go out there, my sweet Jr. High son, and shine like the star you are!

Tuesday, March 3, 2009

Tuesday Treasures

This last week I have spent a lot of time with Darion. It was good to be able to have one-on-one time with him. I enjoyed talking and laughing with him! This week, Darion is my Tuesday Treasure!! Unfortunately not all our time together was doing fun things, but spending a few visits at the doctor's office and at the hospital. Before I scare everyone, Darion is not hurt- he is o.k. Darion has been diagnosed with a "tick disorder." Before I make everyone sick- "tick" as in sudden, brief, repeated movements and vocal sounds, not the blood sucking tick that you get when you go camping. Just clarifying!! The MRI tech, when getting Darion ready for his MRI, asked him where he got his tick from. Darion and I both looked at her, very confused. She continued, "Did you get the tick from camping or just being outside?" Trying really hard not to laugh, I corrected her and then asked, "Do they do MRI's for ticks, the bugs?" Apparently they do to check for Lyme Disease- who knew!!! :) The question just threw me off a little bit!

Anyway, back to the tick disorder. We went and saw a Neurologist and she wanted an MRI and an EEG done to rule out any other problems. So, on Monday we went and had an MRI done on Darion. If anyone has ever had one, you know that it can be kind of scary, especially for a 10 year old. Darion was very brave! He got a little nervous when they put him in the tunnel and when they put the IV in to do contrast, but all in all I was very impressed with his strength during such a scary procedure.

On Tuesday, Darion earned his Bear badge in cub scouts. Although I have never really been good at routinely working on scout things, Darion worked very hard on his requirements. He is now in Webelos. I am hoping that I will be a little more on the ball this time and work on his requirements with him more often. I do have to make a huge shout out to all of Darion and Austin's scout leaders- both past and present. Holy cow- they are AMAZING!! I have never seen or heard of scout leaders that put so much time, effort and love into each scout and the scout program! When I tell my friends how on the ball the scout leaders are, they are very jealous! I, among many other parents, am so appreciative of all you do!! Thank you!!

Here are a few pix from scouts!




On Wednesday, we went to UVRMC to have his EEG done. Darion didn't think this one was scary at all. The hard thing with an EEG is that you need to be sleep-deprived. He had to go to sleep 2 hours later than usual and wake up 2 hours earlier. Darion thought that the staying up later was pretty awesome until..... 4:30 am came along!!! Needless to say, we were both pretty tired and came home and took a nap!! YAY for naps!! :) Here are a few pictures of the EEG. He thought he looked a little like Medusa! :)
Darion never ceases to amaze me!! Even when his "friends" make fun of him and his ticks or rudely tell him "just stop it, it's annoying", he tries to be brave and not let their comment bother him. He just simply says, "I can't stop them, I don't know how." I know that kids will be kids and that they're young, but from a mothers view-point, it doesn't make it any easier! I have a really hard time when he comes home from school and tells me things that kids have said about his ticks. My heart aches when I see how sad he is. I always try to comfort him and tell him how awesome he is! I try to teach him about trials and that if he asks for help, Heavenly Father will help him! Darion is very receptive to this last one. He has so much faith, it is amazing! Darion never holds grudges to his friends and most of the time, after talking to me, doesn't even bring it back up- until next time. I guess it's the inevitable "next time" that makes me the most sad! I wish I could stop the hurtful comments. I wish I could make his "twitches" (that's what Darion calls them) go away- but I can't- and, as all you mothers out there will agree, that stinks!!! I just want to fix it! I am comforted, however, at the strong young boy that he is becoming. He is learning, in his young life, about taking the hard times and turning them into strength and tenacity. If Darion had a motto I think this would be it: "I can't change the direction of the wind. But I can adjust my sails." Always keep sailing, Darion.

I am so proud of my sweet Darion. I enjoyed the individual time I was given with him! I love you, Darion! Twitches or no twitches- You are amazing! :)